You think you are not worth shit? HA! I laugh at in your face, at your mere pretence at worthlessness! Hold my tepid weak arse beer. - You may claim that you are 'not worth shit'... - But I promise you this princess - I am worth Far Less than you are! - For behold! I Am the amazingly ‘disposable man’! - No one is worth less and is more disposable than me!

My kids (now grown) watched more modern anime - And I DO and Did still feel the ick when teen female characters are overly sexualised ..OR.... They pull the tied story trope that "technicality" the character is "actually" some over 100 year old non human so that makes it ok for them to act hypersexual or have gross things done to them - even though their physical appearance is that of a 14 year old girl. -  And there seems to be almost no one I can share these reserverations and discomforts with. My worries just get shot down and I just end up feeling stupid. . But despite that, the deep instinctual guy level huge "Ick!" Won't go away. . The whole thing just feels so wrong in some core way that I feel should not have justify that feeling. . I just know it's very broken and wrong. I feel it in my bones. . It's Not ok. And the creators of this type of art, and such stories, should ask themselves some serious questions. .

.  I hate my ex wife. She dumbed me after 30 years.  I refuse to see or speak to her ever again.  . Not because she is evil,  Because she is Not evil.  There was no infidelity on either side,  She just fell out of love with me.  She wanted us to stay "Freinds".  (I am too weak to do that.) .  Not because it is morally right to do,  Because it is Not morally right to do.  She does Not deserve to be hated this way. .  But because I need to.  It's the only way I can survive this level of pain and hope to move on. Anger is easier than tears.  . I don't hate her, to punish her.  I hate her, to save me. .  I hate her so I can survive.

  As a Man I look at all the sexual abuse, rapes, violence and intimidation that us men do And it makes me feel SO ashamed of being a man That I want to rip my own balls off with my bare hands ?! Seriously? How can the rest of you blokes be so delusional and fucked up that you can take any pride at all, in your manhood? I’m finding myself constantly, increasingly sickened by what we are. . . ... I would really, Really, REALLY like my nightmares to stop now.  - I want to be allowed to have a good nights sleep. .

When I feel rejected or alienated. I shouldn't dig at people. It's no one's fault that I don't belong anywhere. Not even mine. . It's just how the dice rolled. Some are born with no legs or blind Some are born impared in other ways. I was born, 'wrong', 'slightly off' and 'too different but in a bad way', ...and people naturally sense that and instinctively back away. . - It's a healthy normal survival reaction to have. So I shouldn't pick on people or poke at them for it.

. Why I'd never vote 'reform uk' : . Because I was taught that a real UK patriots fight naz1s. - NOT vote for them. . So if you vote reform, Then, Piss off you fifth filth colonist naz1 traitor. . For once, let's Not copy the USA and be as stupid as they have been! Let not Not be corporate America's little side bitch, yet again. . Let's Not vote in our own budget bargain basement mini shriveled pocket trump! . .

Dear, Anyone who thinks I either flirted with them, or ‘chatted them up’ lately, NO, I DID NOT. I have given up on romantic stuff for quite a while now. That why I now have the scruffy ugly beard and not bothered with a haircut. Because I don’t need to look attractive to anyone anymore! If that ever changes, If I ever become that deluded and stupid again Then I will start shaving again and get a haircut. So, relax I have given up, I just ain’t interested anymore.