. In case anyone was wondering why I am not leaving the flat as much, lately. I don't get embarrassed the way others do and I feel I have nothing to lose, so I'll just be brutally honest - However bad it looks. You might feel my reasons are silly or immature, but they are real to me. . Basically For me, Trying for for any success, just for myself is not enough If I am not part of a couple, then I think "Why bother." I have been single (after 30 years marriage) for 18 months or more now. After this long, I am starting to give up. And the more I give up on being loved The less I want to leave the flat . I find social situations too far stressful - for so little chance of meeting anyone 'special', ever. . Most people think this is a silly outlook. And whether that is true or not - it is who I am. . I am not meant or built for "single life" It does not make me feel "free" It just makes me feel like an incomplete half a person. After I have d

I hope that I do not wake up tomorrow morning.

. - The next stage of "Religion" will NOT be organized OR have social media pages, leaders or structures that would be recognized as such, of ANY kind. - Including these ones set before you NOW. - DO NOT FOLLOW ANYONE! - DONATE NOTHING (that is not for those in need!) - And ALWAYS suspect everyone but yourself of being a fake prophet for profit! - YOU ARE YOUR OWN CHURCH! YOUR OWN TEACHER, AND YOUR OWN SACRED GROUND! - NO ONE ELSE! . . ...take a hint and take the harder, more difficult path instead!  - Feeling lost, alone and in chaos is a good start. -  Not a bad thing!  - Be "THE HERMIT", alone and lost with only your inner lantern for guidance  - And do not follow any external "HYROPHANT!" . There are no higher perceptions or lower perceptions - Just perceptions There are no higher planes of existence or lower planes of existence - Just planes of existence There is no higher self or Lower self - Just self. There is no higher and lower - There is no gr