. In case anyone was wondering why I am not leaving the flat as much, lately. I don't get embarrassed the way others do and I feel I have nothing to lose, so I'll just be brutally honest - However bad it looks. You might feel my reasons are silly or immature, but they are real to me. . Basically For me, Trying for for any success, just for myself is not enough If I am not part of a couple, then I think "Why bother." I have been single (after 30 years marriage) for 18 months or more now. After this long, I am starting to give up. And the more I give up on being loved The less I want to leave the flat . I find social situations too far stressful - for so little chance of meeting anyone 'special', ever. . Most people think this is a silly outlook. And whether that is true or not - it is who I am. . I am not meant or built for "single life" It does not make me feel "free" It just makes me feel like an incomplete half a person. After I have d...

I hope that I do not wake up tomorrow morning.

. - The next stage of "Religion" will NOT be organized OR have social media pages, leaders or structures that would be recognized as such, of ANY kind. - Including these ones set before you NOW. - DO NOT FOLLOW ANYONE! - DONATE NOTHING (that is not for those in need!) - And ALWAYS suspect everyone but yourself of being a fake prophet for profit! - YOU ARE YOUR OWN CHURCH! YOUR OWN TEACHER, AND YOUR OWN SACRED GROUND! - NO ONE ELSE! . . ...take a hint and take the harder, more difficult path instead!  - Feeling lost, alone and in chaos is a good start. -  Not a bad thing!  - Be "THE HERMIT", alone and lost with only your inner lantern for guidance  - And do not follow any external "HYROPHANT!" . There are no higher perceptions or lower perceptions - Just perceptions There are no higher planes of existence or lower planes of existence - Just planes of existence There is no higher self or Lower self - Just self. There is no higher and lower - There is no gr...

 ! Do NOT bother "Stealing" other people's romantic partners DO NOT BE A SUCH DUMB ASS! If they were Not faithful to them! THEN THEY WILL NOT BE FAITHFUL TO YOU! You are NOT some magical exception! Have some common sense! Cheaters CHEAT! You are far better off alone! . - "Man" "Woman" or "Other" / "Gay" "Straight" or "other" - Any cheater is 4X times more likely to cheat again than any non-cheater! This is not a Gender or Sexuality thing! It is a personal integrity and willpower thing! And either you have those things - or you don't!  If they don't! DUMP THEM! DUMP THEM NOW! Do Not look back! Never look back! !

To cut a long story short… NOT RECOMMENDED!

. WHAT DO WOMEN WANT? The answer is frustratingly simple No man can speak for all men. And no woman can speak for all women. . AND MOST CERTAINLY NO MAN CAN SPEAK FOR ALL WOMEN... (or vice versa)  . There is no magical "One thing" Everyone is a unique individual with their own tastes and rules. No one is a mere mass-produced labelled product. There is no one thing that applies to nearly half the entire human race. And to think that there is, or could be, - is just dumb ass! . But pretending to have an answer, Can make a couple of bucks sometimes...

. THEY DO NOT LIVE HERE! By Ross E F Lombardi. . "This Cat?" "This Cat is not ours" "This Cat does not really live here..." "They just visit!" "Yes!" "We do open the door for them" "Yes" "He does like his own spot to sleep on" "Yes" "We do put a cushion on that spot to keep things tidy" "Yes" "We feed them" "Yes," "We Did get them their own bowl to save us using the human dishes" "Yes" "We did do the same for their water, for common sense hygiene reasons" "Well, Yes," "We did start getting a tiny bit of their own food," "We were shopping anyway and the food was kinda just there, so why not?" "Ok, Yes," "They did not like that food so now we get him the slightly nicer special food" "Well, Of course.." "They have a few cheap toys!" "It was the anniversary ...

. How can I win? I have 3 options A ) and B ) and C )  - But really only 2 options A ) and B )  And both of those are inadequate and flawed.  I can not see an option D ) yet... . IF... . A ) ...I isolate myself then the crushing loneliness makes me more and more sleazy as my sex drive hormones poison and corrupt my own perceptions and brain. . BUT IF... . B ) ...I leave the flat and try and be part of the world. My already slightly corrupted hormone-damaged personality and a last hopeful spark in me, Has far more opportunity to make some poor lass accidentally uncomfortable. - As I imagine shit that is not there. . While option... . C ) Ripping my own balls off is NOT an option! (And apparently ripping my own balls off - although proactive, also counts as self-harm and is therefore frowned upon by society.) . So? <Shrug> How can I win? I can't do both! I can't NOT be in two situations at once, both NOT in the flat AND NOT part of the world! I kinda have to do one of...

! So,   YES!   "THE BOYS" IS A SPOOF SATIRE!   !  How the hell is anyone so dense - So absolutely fucking stupid beyond belief that the name "Homelander" was NOT already a major fucking clue! - Even BEFORE the early scene where he blows up a plane with a child on board! - DAM! - HOW FUCKING STUPID ARE YOU! - Hey <shrug> If you hate intellectualism, fair enough that's your personal choice and call! - I won't judge you for that - That's your right to freedom of individual choice. But this is not rocket science here! This is very basic stuff that any idiot to immediately get! - If you did not see this straight away, then you do not have enough common sense to drive a motorized vehicle and should have your license confiscated! And maybe you should have someone else be in charge of wiping your arse while you're at it! Because if this shit was not obvious to YOU? - From episode one? Then you clearly need special headgear and to be supervised by a med...

. So, I am putting out an EP of 3 acapella songs. (That means just my singing voice and no music) It will be On All of the main music streaming services, including Spotify and Amazon Music. It will be available to stream and hear sometime after the next 48 hours. Good, bad, or terrible Either way <shrug> It is just a thing I am doing... . .

. Social Anxiety (My version) I am the small dark dude, faking a smile in the darkness. For me, - It is like this. Everything is too bright, too intense. Everyone around becomes too real and too fake at the same time. Then the hypervigilance kicks in. You try in vain to take in every little, small detail, all at once, and of course, it becomes overwhelming. Then the stupidest part happens You suddenly feel responsible for everyone's safety and go on some weird version of guard duty. (Which is idiotic because I am a just flabby 50-year-old) The best I can do is just get lost in the music and dance to distract myself Or let panic hit and head home to hide as quickly as possible. No one realises how hard it is to leave the flat, and then keep me out, sometimes. It is totally mental! It does not have to make sense, This is a mental illness. . . . .

. IF THE UK MOVED TO A USA HEALTH CARE SYSTEM? . I'd simply not get any insurance and let myself die instead. I'm not even worth the cost of a single pint of cheap larger a month. - Let alone a few hundred quid a month! AND I don't enjoy living anyway... So, "Fuck 'em!" If I had to pay or die? Then I choose death! .

. Social media be like... . Buy! Accept Yourself Buy! Change Yourself Buy! Accept You Buy! Change You Buy! Accept Buy! Change Buy! Accept/Change/Buy Spend some fucking money! .

. Person 1: "Do you have any leftover bacon?" . Me: "What the hell is 'leftover' bacon?" . Person 1: "You know, Bacon that is 'leftover'- '" . Me: "What!?" . Person 1: "What? What part of That, Don't You understand?" . Me: "I understand the individual words, but you have put them in some weird ass nonsense order!" "Are you trying out some new weirdo surreal poetry?" "Is this some kind of joke I am not smart enough to understand?" "Is this a new street slang that I am too old and not cool about to know?" "Are you having a stroke?!" . Person 1: "Let us try This, a bit at a time..." "I will go slowly..." . Me: "Ok" . Person 1: "Do you? Ross Lombardi?" . Me "Ok, I am with you so far" . Person 1: "Have any bacon" . Me: "Got it, keep going" . Person 1: "That is..." . Me: "Ok so far......

<shrug> History repeats forever We never learn anything or really ever morally progress as a species. It's all the same crap / different century - just made easier with machines. Which is why I am a Misanthrope. All of us humans innately totally suck! ...and we have far less so-called "divine spark", than a rancid pig turd. If I could save the human race from itself, I would actively choose not to. And If I could prevent anyone else from saving the human race, then I would. Everything ends eventually. Our time is now. It is time for us as a species to just fuck off!

. I find the "School of Charm mentality" totally sickening!  - You will never find real love that way - Pretending to be someone else will just have you dating the wrong person and eventually end in a messy break-up! - Be yourself straight away and always! - It is far better to be with NO ONE than the WRONG ONE! .

! I dissent! Not speaking about anyone's situation but my own. Other people in other situations are their business. But... For Me personally. I am not giving some kind of golden justification ticket to my ex-wife who dumped me after 30 years of marriage. She can fuck right off with that shit. I will never voluntarily speak to her ever again. I will never forgive or forget the pain she has caused me. If she was lying injured in the street I'd walk away and not call any help for her and feel no guilt over my callousness. And anyone who knows me understands that my refusing to help anyone, (as I usually try and help everyone,) is as extreme a sentence as I can ever pass on to any person. And she is one of only two people in the entire world that I hold that policy to. The only other person is my violent wife-beating genetic father. So, That is how much I loathe her now... I loath her just as much as I hate my abusive blood father. That is how low she is to me now. Susan Catherine ...

  . Life and Living PRIZE List . A hundred 3rd place prizes - Multiple shag partners . A handful of 2nd place prizes - Some personnel strength of character . Two joint 1st place prizes - One romantic partner and you are both besotted with each other for life. . . And a billion runner-up token consolation prizes for everyone else, of buckets of greasy food, drink, maybe drugs and lying to themselves "that they don't need anyone" while secretly dying of loneliness. . Only getting the 3rd place prize is far from ideal - but it is far better than 'winning' nothing at all! Sometimes you just have to settle for what you can get out of life. Not everyone gets to win a first prize. Hell, Not everyone even gets to win one of the consolation prizes! . Most people don't get Anything at all! .