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MY ROLEPLAY DM RULE: NO more lazy orphan cliché PC backstories allowed!

! MY ROLEPLAY DM RULE: NO more lazy orphan cliché PC backstories allowed! ! MY DM COMMITMENT! NO more lazy orphan PC backstories allowed! I Will create NPC parents for your character! And they WILL be irritating! . <Player moans endlessly that they desperately want to have a dull cliché orphan backstory...> . Yeah, well,  <shrug>  "If" I am your DM!  - Then your parents are going to turn out to have been alive, all along,  (or be raised back up as intelligent undead)  They are going to find you!  They are going to want to reconnect with you,  And they WILL annoy the hell out of your character for comic effect!  - For MY amusement!  <I did not watch decades of sitcom viewing to waste all that potential inspiration and material!>   - Plus it is an easy bed for story seeds.  . - But no one says you have to be in my game!   . That's your choice!  It's not the law of the land!  "You know where the door is!"  "No hard feelings!"  &qu

"They used to drink from a hose"

"! "They used to drink from a hose" !" Oh "HOSE"! That makes far more sense now! They meant "hose" ! I always wondered why local prostitutes were so integral to local water distribution! ...And why there was always such a thirst-quenching prostitute hanging about in their backyard all the time, back when they were just kids. I thought there must be a very common yet unspoken, dark-as-all-hell, family secret! ? - Turns out, I was just mishearing what was being said by my Boomer elders the entire time! !

Just hit them - HARD!

! Let's just cut the crap - If someone is a fucking racist, incel or homophobic bigot - and they are throwing their crappy 'god slave' agenda around to excuse their evil - Then just hit them - HARD! - Yes, I know this will cause me a Fartbook ban! And quite honestly, I don't give a crap! - I am getting sick of tiptoeing around the feelings of all these right-wing wusses! !

SOME 52nd BIRTHDAY DRINKS. “What could possibly go wrong?”

! SOME 52nd BIRTHDAY DRINKS. . “Ok, I know I have not touched alcohol in a while, in order to lose weight” “But it's my 52nd Birthday…!” “I am in the town with a bit more money than usual” “I am in a good mood for once” “And I want to treat myself to a few double rum and cokes” “What could possibly go wrong?” Then 3 am ish – 10 ish or so more hours later… . Cool writing Totally Inappropriate yes, but still cool. . Far too cool to destroy… Far too cool not to show off… . But the really annoying part? The really annoying part is this! . Why can’t I write this well when I am sober? ? ? ? Original text: . . My ex-wife after throwing me away like garbage. (after 30 years) Is now with someone new. Despite the broken heart: I take great spiteful solace that I have a weird point of view about ethics and love, That no one else seems to agree with. . This means that her 'new man' is not as weird as me. This means that her 'new man' will be far mo

I must be old and out of touch...

. Random Internet person: "Cheating in 2024 is not physical. sending that friend request, liking their story, hiding text messages. You're already beyond cheating." . ME: I must be old and out of touch... ....Are we just talking about normal conversations about mundane general life stuff and sharing comedy cat memes here? Like any other friend? Or am I missing something here? Because I want to be In a relationship without any needless insecurity on either side. . Random Internet person: "Excuses" . ME: Nope, Married for 30 years and was never unfaithful. Divorced now. Been single for 2 years. My ex-wife is still the last person I kissed. So, as I said, "I must be old and out of touch.." . Even as my marriage fell apart I would not have been unfaithful, Not because of how I felt about her, (she can rot in hell) But instead because of how I feel about myself! - I have too much sense of honour, pride and personal discipline to use a bad relationship as a

Learning something deeply esoteric.

. I saw a brief story about someone learning something deeply esoteric. . I suddenly felt a familiar creepy cold sensation on a new part of myself opening. . Then I told myself, . "Hang on?" "Before I open a new can of perceptual worms," "Let's apply my own version of Plato's 3 Sleeves vs. Rumours." "But this time altered for little figurative golden bumble bees." . "One: will this new revelation make me happy?" . "Well, no," my spirit said. . "Ok" "Fair enough, personal happiness is not the most important thing anyway" "Two: will this new knowledge make others happy?" . "No" replied my higher self "It won't" . "Ok, then" "Three: will this 'greater insight' help people?" (Because making people happy and helping them are often not the same thing.) . "Again, no" my deeper self-admitted. . "So you want to unlock a new part o

THEY WANT US TO HATE EACH OTHER! - But who are "they"?

. THEY WANT US TO HATE EACH OTHER! . But who are "they"? "They" are largely (but not completely) NOT some conspiracy, or secret world government order. "They" are mostly (but not completely) NOT some level of World Bank or a bunch of evil CEOs. "THEY" are NOT the demons of hell or wicked spirits from beyond. . - "THEY" are something else - "THEY" are something much worse! So much worse! Something FAR more powerful! Something NASTIER, that makes Angels, Devils and Demons tread lightly. The Scariest Power in the Multiverse! Something that makes satan cry with fear and that makes god sweat with worry. . "THEY"! . - "THEY, are instead, the parts within us who feel insecure and who 'match in time' to fit in. - "THEY" are the lazy part of us that don't ask inconvenient questions. - "THEY" are the cowardly parts of us that are too scared to defend others. - "THEY, are instead, the

I was stupid enough to join the eHarmony dating site

 . In a moment of weakness I was stupid enough to join the eHarmony dating site Now I am stuck paying £13 On contract. Until the 19th of July 2026. I am a Total Fucking Idiot! . It is NOT eHarmony’s fault, That I am a totally undatable toilet of a subhuman being. You can’t make scrambled eggs with dog shit No matter how fancy your algorithms are! . .

“Hawk Tuah girl”A Ross E F Lombardi parody, Using the tune "Uptown Girl"...

. “Hawk Tuah girl” A Ross E F Lombardi parody, Using the tune "Uptown Girl" by Billy Joel. . ooooo . Hawk Tuah girl She’s been living in her Hawk Tuah world I bet she never had to try I bet her momma told her exactly why . I’m pissed off the Hawk Tuah girl She’s been living in her Hawk Tuah world She just took the chance while she can And now I am stuck as a jealous man Thats what I am . And when she saw it And took the chance that she could And she used it Just as anyone would . Being a creative's tough Just because - I’m not as good - As a Hawk Tuah girl . I’ve seen her in her Hawk Tuah world Getting all of this success. While my life’s is a big hot mess . She made a choice . oooooo . Hawk Tuah girl You know I can’t compete with that girl But maybe - If reality kicks in I'll understand what kind of fool, I've been And just give in. . And while I work And make art all the time And I write stuff And sometimes it rhymes . Being a creative's tough But she got t

"...on the dance floor." A poem By Ross E F Lombardi (VID Version)

"...on the dance floor." a poem By Ross E F Lombardi.

. "...on the dance floor." By Ross E F Lombardi . I need to dance sometimes. But the reasons why are never seen. . I do not dance to find a date. If I like some woman, Then it will be because of a cool connecting conversation, Not just because we met on some dance floor. . I do not dance because I think that I am good at dancing. What anyone else thinks of my dancing is not my problem. ...Or at least... ...It should not be... . I dance to fight... But not in the way you might think... . I am always fighting on the dance floor. No one else is harmed, No bouncers involved No cops called Alone or in a crowd, I am still dancing alone. . But not dancing. Fighting. Fighting on the dance floor against a thug. A thug no one else can perceive. . I am fighting on the dance floor. Not just fighting. I am fighting For My Life on the dance floor. Against the ass hole that is trying to kill me. . Dancing is my weapon. If I lose - I get murdered. If I lose I die. . Dodging the sadness. Bloc

The Philippa Foot Trolly Ethical Dilemma SOLVED!

! The Philippa Foot Trolly Ethical Dilemma SOLVED! . Two tracks One has five people on and the trolly will hit and kill them all. The other track has only one person on and YOU can switch the tracks! Not switching the tracks lets five people die! However... Switching the track saves five lives but YOU have killed someone! . . MY VIEW: . EASY! Switch the track . - Morally, Inaction is still a decision that you have made. . Deciding NOT to act makes you responsible and guilty for 4 extra deaths than there could have been! . - Sometimes you must make the hard call that others will not, at any and all costs. . - AND then you must not shirk from either the internal self-inflicted cost of your own nightmares OR of the external harsh judgement of the world at large. You have to do what is right AND then pay all the debts due! ! . The ethical dilemma is ignoring the fact that Inaction  (Eg keeping your head down and not protesting or getting involved in fighting a social injustice)  IS STILL a

What a Random person says. Translation of what they really mean: AND My answer (the polite version):

. What a Random person says. Translation of what they really mean: AND My answer (the polite version): . . What a Random person says. . “You look stupid” “I am only saying this to be nice” “Someone should warn You, that you are just embarrassing yourself” “Why don't you have more respect for yourself than that” . . Translation of what they really mean: . “I don’t like what you are doing” “You are making ME cringe and uncomfortable” “Why don’t you Respect ME and MY opinion of what you are doing!” “I don’t approve” “I think I am cool and that you should want to impress me.” “I feel you should respect and obey me and my authority.” “CONFORM!” . . My answer (the polite version): . “It's not ME that I do not respect” “I have plenty of self-respect” “It is You and your opinions that I have absolutely No respect or regard for.” “Because I don’t think you are ‘cool’ –“ “You are not my leader” “I am not your follower” “I don’t need your approval or for you to like me” “Your cringe issue

50 inch to 'thinner' reveal. Done WITHOUT any gym membership!

Answer these questions honestly. BUT Do not post your answers

. OK Personal reality check time… Answer these questions honestly Do not post your answers Posting your answer in public will cause you to lie to yourself. – just ask yourself when you are next alone with your thoughts. . If a very average-looking man, Not good looking Not bad looking Just average. Was witnessed by you, risking their own life, to save someone helpless. If they asked you out? Would you date them? . If that same man, Looking exactly the same, Doing exactly the same brave thing. But they were homeless And they asked you out? Would you still date them? . OR . If a very average-looking man, Not good looking Not bad looking. Just average. Had lots of money. Asked you out? Would you date them? . If that same rich man, Looking exactly the same, Was the CEO of a company That made something or did something that although totally legal, Was also evil or made or did something evil, Based on his successful leadership and ruthless core values? And they asked you out? Would you stil

Mere Looks

 

Dear child of the world, You must know and accept this...

.      Dear child of the world You must know and accept that there will always be someone less well-off than you. You must know and accept that there will always be someone with more than you. There will always be those both more beautiful and uglier than you are. There will always be those with more money or less money than you have. There will always be those blessed with more charm than you and those with less charm than you. There will be those who are loved more than you and those who are less loved than you. And you must know and accept this simple thing and remember one core universal truth among all others. Which is simply this… …My fellow human… .   . hate them all equally. burn this fucking world to the fucking ground then sew the ground with anthrax, nuclear waste, and then salt… all humans are innately crap and no one is worth saving… burn it all down… HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! …every last mother fucking cunt one of them …and revel in every single tear of others… fucking shit

ARE YOU TIGGERED?

? ARE YOU TIGGERED? ? LOL!  - Allways!  - About everything  - That is how dangerous mental illness works!  - I go to bed suicidally depressed  - and I wake up each morning homicidally enraged!  - There is no kudos or any victory in ripping a wet tissue paper any more than there is any honourable victory in triggering me!  - HELL!  LOL!  I get triggered over the peeling of an orange or over wiping my own ass!  - Either as a victim or perpetrator I am a murder waiting to happen. - (let's hope it is as a victim) - -  Just Thank goodness I live in the UK with gun control laws!  - If I lived in the USA a load of people would have died by now!  (People like me are why USA gun laws are stupid!) . . Seriously!  I am so utterly disposable with absolutely no value, it has become hilarious!  It actually makes me giggle now!  For In a world full of losers!  - No one is more worthless and less deserving of life than ME!  FFS!  LOL! . . I... cannot be, do not want to be, & refuse to be save

I only do 5 sit-ups a day.

. As told to me by someone I know: But you have probably never met him. . . "I am just a harmless flabby, soft-spoken 50-year-old! Honest! I am no threat to anyone! - I only do 5 sit-ups a day. - And that can take up to 10 minutes on a good day!" . . I do them very slowly. . It takes me ages to do them! And I am very tired and short of breath afterwards! . I do them very slowly. . With a 5 Lb weight parallel to my head in each hand. Elbows kept at 90 degrees and straight forward at the shoulders, So they are held out in front of me. . While standing up, Feet at shoulder width, knees bent just enough to feel it slightly, . Soon I might try ten sit-ups a day. But only 5 of each, Stood on just one of my legs each time. The other leg pulled up behind me, so the knee is pointed straight down. . Again very, Very, VERY slowly, As slow as I can, Holding midway at times, To feel every little bit of resistance. Trying to spend 2 minutes on each sit-up. . Then I move on to all the other

Ewwww god?

! Ewwww god?  YUCK! <lower case 'g' on purpose out of intentional disrespect>  god can kiss my fat hairy smelly ass!  god is evil  - he is just as evil as saten  <lower case 's' on purpose out of intentional disrespect>  but with a better PR department. . Someone needs to tell god to "fuck off!" I don't mean atheist I mean believers! Both god and satan! Both of you "FUCK OFF!" and leave us mortals the hell alone! . .

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