. 11 Reasons why I am  'a catch' . 1. REAL I am loyal and looking for something real... ...Not just 'companionship' or a ONS. If it's not love, then it ain't worth it. It is better to be with no one - than the wrong one. So, I don't ask absolutely everyone out in all directions. So if we are dating you know that you are special to me! - not just a mere 'gap filler'. . 2. PHYSICAL INVESTMENT. Although still flabby, I am far less flabby than I used to be. I have gone from a 50"" waist and walking with a stick to 38"" and dancing lots. I will get even thinner and less fabby as time goes on. I am an investment worth taking as my physical value is very likely to go up! . 3 CONSISTENCY Even though I am self-improving - That does not mean you not already perfect to me. If we are dating then I must already like you a lot, just as you are! . 4 SUPPORTIVE ...BUT! Despite on 3 above. If you DO want to change anything about yourself. Then I ...

. Ok, I admit it... By Ross e f Lombardi. . Ok, I admit It. I admit that I am struggling a little bit. I admit I am bruising my own soul a little bit. I admit that I am flirting with the void a little bit  . Ok, I can see it. I can see the value in numbness. I can understand a longing for this nightmare to stop. I can feel the seduction of 'self-ending'.  . Ok. I admit that I Do want it. I DO want to quit. I DO want to end. I DO want the comfortable cloth of forever nothingness. . Ok, I'll try it. Try Just a little. Try, To walk, Just a little bit. Try, To notice random street strangers in their lives. Just a tiny bit. Try, To hold on just a bit longer, Just a bit. . I can't keep doing this forever. Forever is too large, Too big, Too impossible to do. . Ok, I admit that I can't do forever. No one could! No one is that strong! In the face of this sickness. It cannot be done! Definitely not a weak shity wuss like me! . But maybe I can go down swinging? But maybe I can...

"Some days..." By Ross E F Lombardi . Some days, there is no moral crusade or political agenda. . Some days, you want to do an act of terrorism for no reason at all! . Some days, you feel so overwhelmed and overfilled with pain that you just want to release the pressure... ...to squirt that shit over everyone... ...like toxic - hot - viper - poison - hate cum - over the whore worlds back. . Some days, you want to kill a random stranger... ...Somone deeply loved by many... ...just to make their family mourn their loss. ...And fill their community with doubt and fear. . Some days, NOT all days, just some. - Only some. You DO want to set the world on fire, Or spread a plague, Or strap a bomb to your chest, Or carry a weapon. . Some days, . Sometimes, . It is Very hard to find any humanity within. To Not rage - and scream - and torture - and harm - and kill. . Some days of my mental illnesses Are much harder than others . Much - much -harder! . T...

. HARDER! . I used to have a 50"" waste and need to walk with a stick. I now have a 38"" waste and dance a lot for hours. It took a lot of effort and will to do that. losing weight IS extremely difficult! . And so far... I have kept the weight off! . BUT I AM TELLING YOU ALL THIS,  RIGHT NOW!! . Losing 10 lbs in weight, and keeping it off for years, is piss easy ... ...compared to trying to lose a single ounce of Self Loathing, and keeping it gone for a single hour!!! . .

? Did you know this? https://www3.nhk.or.jp/nhkworld/en/news/20241026_17/ Well, You Do Now...! I 'Called It'!  This reminds me of how World War One started.  A relative minor - (minor that is compared to a world war, obviously) - conflict sucking in all the allies from both sides. It was inevitable.  If it were not the Ukrainian war it would have just been a different one instead.  The real reason is the unavoidable environmental collapse and unsustainability of world human consumption of natural resources. .  When "good people" get desperate.  Then bad things happen.  . In short  ...I saw something like this coming ages ago.  I am not surprised. No psychic powers are needed.  Just a knowledge of history.  An understanding of human nature.  And being able to spot the patterns. (I have a weird brain)

I know we " need" rules  but on a purely personal note:  The very fact that "rules" exist makes my skin itch and I instinctively want to break them or burn something...  I am not looking for anyone to agree with me,  I do know it sounds nuts.  I am only giving an honest reaction, that's all, Just saying. - Nothing more...

. For ANYONE who needs to know - This is an ANTI-violence poem! Read it till the VERY END! - Not just halfway through . (WARNING! Emotional Trigger Warning - Extra Dark poem) . "Somedays..." By Ross E F Lombardi . Somedays there is no moral crusade or political agenda. . Somedays you want to do an act of terrorism for no reason at all! . Somedays you feel so overwhelmed and overfilled with pain that you just want to release the pressure... ...to squirt that shit over everyone... ...like toxic - hot - viper - poison - hate cum - over the whore worlds back. . Somedays you want to kill a random stranger... ...Somone deeply loved by many... ...just to make their family mourn their loss. ...And fill their community with doubt and fear. . Somedays, NOT all days, just some. - Only some. You DO want to set the world on fire, Or spread a plague, Or strap a bomb to your chest, Or carry a weapon. . Somedays, . Sometimes, . It is Very hard to find any humanity within. To Not rage - and s...

- I created a risqué poetry performance thing on TikTok (it is a comedy poem where I show a bit of skin - but NO privates) and shared it everywhere. And now apparently one of the people I spammed thinks I specifically targeted her. Which makes me feel a little insulted. So, that MIGHT cause me some hassle. She thinks I sent it to just her, and Apparently, both her mum and her boyfriend want to hit me ... Blah ... Blah ... Blah.... I barely care. ... . Yeh know what!? I sent that Vid EVERYWHERE! The only thing I am actually guilty of, Is treating her exactly the same as everyone else in the entire world! - Regardless of their age, sexuality OR gender! . https://youtu.be/Iol6UMpEo-s?si=QoOKtsPDXAT3JUs5 . Get ’em out Lass! - For all of us to see! By Ross E F Lombardi . I love a big pair on a lass, Not fake, Firm and real. I love huge ones on a woman. I love how they feel. . I love a couple of big-uns’ Large, up front and seen. I like it when they are So, obvious and blatant. That som...

. Get ’em out Lass! - For all of us to see! By Ross E F Lombardi . I love a big pair on a lass, Not fake, Firm and real. I love huge ones on a woman. I love how they feel. . I love a couple of big-uns’ Large, up front and seen. I like it when they are So, obvious and blatant. That some call them obscene! . I want to see them all the time, I like how they look on her. I love how they make my heart flip  And my musky man penis stir! . If you are thinking TITS - Then you are wrong! A Large Handful of Courage  - Next to a Huge Willpower mound. You don’t get much of That Anymore, -   To the modern UK pound! . #Poetry #Comedy #Humour #Cringe #sexisim #tits  .

. So, Sorry! I do apologize! I would absolutely love to stay on social media all day and get angry at the world and poison my mind and soul to do my fair part to increase page engagement and boost Ad revenue for mega-rich people. I really would! - Honest! But unfortunately, I Do have to go now! Because. apparently, "A settlement needs my help" . #Fallout4Gameplay #fallout4memes #Fallout76 #falloutnewvegas #fallout4 #fallout4mods .

. Random person - to me:  "I would not piss on you if you were on fire!" . My honest reply with a shrug: "You have good taste!" "I would not go out of my way to save 'me' either!" .

. So, my head observes, an internal scream Has larger screams that in them also howl; And these have even larger still inside them to cry “No!” And so proceed as 'Esse intus aeternum in inferno'. . Warped and corrupted by Rat Lombot from the famous flea poem by - Jonathan Swift: Poetry, a Rhapsody .

. Irony: A Definition: When I hate god. But I also, at the same time, Live my life much so closer, to those very same religious values and self-disciplines, Than any church going person I ever yet met... Maybe the godslaves should preach and prey far less and try a bit harder to live by example a bit more instead! . And I do it Without a endless golden lake of spiritual strength to tap into on a whim! I have to scrape my moral will from the bottom of my own limited mere mortal barrel! . Yet I'll get sent to hell, Because I won't bend a knee to a god who is a spoilt petulant brat. While his slaves get to waft into heaven because they lick his rusty balls and call it ice-cream! g0d? Fuck that dude! I choose to burn instead! . If you are doing good to see heaven. Then you are doing good for the wrong reason! You are just taking a bribe! . If you are doing good to avoid hell. Then you are doing it for the wrong reason  You are just cowering to intimidation. . Going good should be a...

. To summarise: My life so far: . My ex-wife of 30 years "Freindzoned" me. She said, "We don't need to love eachother," "We can just have the companionship" . It is hard to accurately articulate that sort of pain. We are now divorced. . I refuse to talk to her or see her. . I was easily replaced. She is now happy with a new man. . My heart is shattered and I may never love again. . I hate her - As Hating her is the only way I can survive. Because I can not take feeling any more tears. I am simply not strong enough to take any more tears! . She gets to be happy. I do not. Nuff said. .

. Follow a leader against their enemy?  NO! DOUBLE NO! TRIPPLE NO! With ice cream and a cherry on top!  . - Better to be a murder victim of the second person - Than be a mere following bitch of the first person: - I'd do almost anything to avoid following or having to bow to anyone! . Worship any god? - I'd rather go to hell! . Show loyalty to a crown? -I would rather be hung, drawn and quartered alive in front of a cheering crowd, on Traitors' Hill! . Fight for a flag? Stick that 'bloody rag on a stick' up your arse! I am not going to kill and die just to make rich wankers richer! . Know my place? HA! Screw that shit! I will squat and poop on Their lawn! . I would rather die defiant with eyes full of rage and dissent in a shit-filled gutter...! ...Instead of being someone else's pawn in their game in a golden cage! . The following of something means being owned by that same thing! . - One exception! Only One! Just One...! . If I am ever lucky enough to fall in ...

. One of my kids left some sweets when they visited. I thought outloud, "Damnit!" "I'm trying to eat healthy.," "I don't want that sugar crap in my house!" . Then I corrected myself, . "I meant, dammit" "I am trying to eat healthy," "I don't want that sugar crap..." "...In this 'Rented Flat' that I am living in!" . Then a wave of sad chilly fog settled over my soul... I am over 50 and fallen from off the housing ladder, I will Now be stuck renting for the rest of my life... . I will Never be able to accurately ever say,  "My House"  Ever Again.... . . After Divorce House Wise: End of the day I should have acted like a "normal person" instead of doing the whole "moral thing"... .

  . Quote from a well-meaning friend, : "...If you can never be loved is there any point in going on about it in a way that may make people sorry for you..." . BUT... ... - That is Not how passionate creativity works! I never choose the ideas! - It is instead, the ideas that choose me! You do the creative 'thang' you are inspired to do... Whether it is a sunset, a rainbow, grief, or the way a plastic bag blows in the wind. Creativity is not about being controlled, It is about being moved to create. It is a feeling... ...with a life of its own! ...Like a fire in the blood that needs to go somewhere! .

 . YOU SHOULD ONLY BE WITH SOMEONE WHO FEELS LUCKY TO HAVE YOU... . ...for me... ...it is never gonna happen... ...it has never happened.... for me.... ever.... ...even back when i was married no one ever said to my ex-wife,  "you are lucky to have ... him " ... it was always  "you are lucky to have Her! " (...even my own mother and family always said that to me, repeatedly) ...i have Never been valued that way... ...and now i realize that i Never, ever, will... . ...i now know.. ...for sure... ..i have finally learned... ...that i can never be loved... .

. WIP . The Empty Heart Fuel Tank. By Ross E F Lombardi . When you had lots of bad memories. . Then you meet someone. . Then together You build 30 years of some good memories. . Memories that gave you strength. . Then you get dumped. . All those good memories are now ruined and become sad memories. . Because it becomes obvious that none of those shared experiences meant anything to them. . And now you have no good memories anymore. . Where can you now get your strength from?!! . What's left? .